Arguments are one of the typical characteristics of human beings. Disagreeing with what is being told, how it is being told and why it is being told is a common trait that we all have and we all show time and again.
While argument is not considered a negative personality, when it becomes frequent it is likely to affect an individual's acceptance in the society and among peers as well.
Behavioral changes in children are noticed gradually during their growing years. The new behaviors determine the traits of the child. If they are shaped into good ones it will make good human beings, if not these remain with the child unchecked and uncorrected. This is where parenting comes into play. One of the major aspects of parenting is to direct the course of behavioral action in a child.
In order to know how to deal with an argumentative child, it is important to know why a child behaves in that manner.
Why does a child argue?
There are several reasons for this.
Many children have a strong personality. They always feel their opinion should always be better than others. People with strong personalities have a deep-seated attitude of never letting anyone else outweigh them in terms of opinion and presentation. This inherent quality generates the urge to speak and sometimes counter what others have said.
For example, if the mom says, "it's a beautiful clear sky", an argumentative child is likely to reply back with, "it is not clear, it is somewhat grayish blue".
Many other children simply want to speak no matter what. These kids are oblivious of the fact that they are triggering arguments with their statement. They do not wish to leave things unsaid. It's just that they do not want to keep it to themselves.
Children often imitate their elders. If a child sees his or her parents or elders arguing, it may pick up this habit. Child psychologists have also corroborated on this and this is why counselors always ask parents about their camaraderie before the child.
Do not stretch the argument
The golden rule to avoid argument is not to continue it. We have always been advised not to give an argument loving person the scope to argue. This rule stands valid for kids too. Once you notice, your child is about to argue, make yourself sparse from the discussion. Do not encourage argument.
Avoid angry statements
This is another golden rule to cut short the argument. Do not use statements like "That's wrong", "Behave properly". While you may be under the assumption that this will scare the child and may correct their behavior, on the other hand you are just laying the ground for the battle of argument to begin.
Do not label the behavior
Do not say that it's bad to argue with elders or that a child should always listen to what elders say. In this way you are killing the inherent curiosity in a child. In such situations try to pull out the negativity and establish something positive.
Instead of labeling the behavior as bad, explain it to your child that the opinion was uncalled for.
